(this one is for the Ladies!)
I was stimulated to write this little piece, by a conversation in Shades of Red, a Vampire group for females in the community. We were discussing the Female Vampire prototype and whether or not it was healthy, and if we, as real life Vampiresses, can live up to it.
It got me thinking about all the things I do that probably contribute to looking and feeling like I live up to that prototype, even though there is no reason anyone HAS to do that. Frankly its something I enjoy and I do not feel it is confined to those of us who LOOK the part, naturally, I feel that ANY female Vampire can adopt this and in FEELING Vampy, I honestly believe you come to LOOK the part.
I hear so many ladies who honestly feel they can’t live up to the impossible standards set by Hollywood and society in general. And, I REALLY DO hear you. The problem is I do not believe that there is no way you can live up to the role of being as beautiful as the prototype we seem to strive to achieve. Beauty comes in SO many forms, with SO many different faces. I believe there are ways for each of us to achieve that elusive peace with ourselves and in doing so reach our personal beauty goals. I also believe it eludes many because they simply do not know how to reach it.
How often do we, as women actually look after ourselves physically and spiritually? We tend to be caregivers, over worked students and workers of various kinds. We have mates who demand our attention and children that require constant care. Sometimes we have medical issues that wear us out and bring us down, and add to all that a society that undervalues us.
I’m here to tell you that in spite of that, there are times and ways to bring our beauty goals to fruition. We can LEARN to take the time to look after our own needs. Little things that can contribute to making us FEEL beautiful, magickal and yes, Vampy.
Its a little thing, but when I am not feeling the part of the prototype and feel the need to boost myself I have a couple of small rituals that I use to bring myself back to the head-space I want to be in. I thought I would share one of them. It doesn’t matter if I have a couple of extra pounds or if I have an acne breakout (yes even at my age) I know that beauty comes in many shapes and sizes and whatever it takes to be that prototype I KNOW I have locked in me somewhere and I only need to let it out. What follows is one of the small personal rituals I use to bring myself into that head and heart space. I say Head and Heart, because THAT is where beauty and sexiness REALLY lies.
One of the best tools I have to bring myself to the right frame of mind is my bath tub.
Scent is a major contributor to mood and memory. A good bath surrounds you with scent and the feel of silky water caressing you, everywhere. There is simply no better tool for the purpose, but I need a couple of special things to make me feel “Vampish”.
First of all I use HOT HOT water to fill my tub (then I add enough cold water to make it comfortable, later). HOT water makes it easy to add the ingredients I need for the purpose at hand. So start that bath on HOT and run it there till it almost reaches my desired depth.
(if you can’t take a bath, take a large basin and follow along, you can STILL do this, especially to your face and shoulders which are the important parts)
Once the bath is running on HOT I go to the kitchen with some of my Aloe Vera plant spines. I crush them, then cut them open and put them in a mug of almost boiling water and let them SIT.
Back at the bathtub I add:
Epson Salts, about a cup
Sea Salts, a scant handful
a bit of baking soda (a handful or so)
a bit of scented bubble bath, or essential oil (I love lily of the valley) or a splash of perfume
Get your favourite robe and your fluffiest bath towels and sheets ready. Hang them where they are handy!
Now, SOAK. Break out your favourite soap, you can even wash your hair in this water, if you do that FIRST before you soap up. Feel free to use that facial mask you’ve been saving, or light some candles, read a book, but most important just SOAK. Forget the world, forget all those responsibilities and just let the water sooth the sore spots. Remember to soak your softest wash cloth and just lay it over your face for a few minutes. Let all the stuff the world throws at you melt away. Just lay in the hot water and baby yourself for as long as you can.
When the time comes that you KNOW its time to get out, your familiar starts nagging you (if you managed to keep your familiar OUT of the bath in the first place) or you feel the tug of “time”, get up and let the water slide off. Wrap yourself in your favourite towels or terry robe long enough to blot up the water. Before you are actually DRY, be sure to give yourself a small spray of your favourite scent, if you have one.
Now… Take the time to make magick happen. Dry your hair, make up a bit, at least some eye liner and lipstick or go all out if you feel like it. Put on your favourite Vampish or Pagan jewellery. If you have a ritual robe or corset you like, this is the time to dress in it. NOW look in the mirror. The Vampiress in front of you IS what the prototype SHOULD be. YOU are a real life Vampiress and THIS is what we look like. BOOM! One female prototype Vampiress.
I know it sounds a little too simple and it really IS, but WE, those of us right here in this group, ARE Vampiresses. WE are the real deal! THIS is what we look like and who we are and whether you believe it or not, we ARE beautiful! Forget the parts of you that you think are not up to par. ALL of you is lovely! Seriously! Look at your eyes. The window to the soul. Look at the lips that smile and those soft graceful shoulders. You are everything a female prototype Vampiress should be. You HAVE to be because YOU are the real thing.
Forget Hollywood. This is what we are supposed to look and feel like. If you don’t think so, then you are probably are not giving yourself enough credit. If you STILL don’t feel the part, then come and ask your Vampiress sisters and we will reassure you of the truth, that you are lovely and everything a female Vampire should be.
There are many ways to bring the dream of the sexy female Vampiress prototype into your life. This is just one small thing you can do to look after yourself. Beauty comes to the fore when you FEEL like you are beautiful. It shines in your eyes and in your movements.
There is no ONE beauty standard. Everyone finds something different to be beautiful and believe me.. there is someone who sees the Vampiress shining in your eyes, even if you do not.
Do YOU have rituals and other things that make you feel like the Vampiress you are?
Please share them, as I have shared mine. Together we are strong and together we can offer support, as sisters. Remember, we are Vampiresses. WE are the REAL thing.